So I turned 57 years old. That’s 399 in dog years, figuring 7 dog years to one human year. 570 in rabbit years. Marguerite’s dog Sweeter is 140 in people years. So she’s 140 and I’m 399. Next year I’ll be 406.
But that’s not entirely accurate, considering dogs turn a year older every 53 days. About a month and a half. So time is really zipping by for them while it’s passing at a not too leisurely pace for us.
I don’t know about parakeet years.
A lot of people figure years in “jail time” even though they haven’t been in jail the whole time. In jail time you get time off your sentence for “good time” and “work time”. Everybody gets one day off for every two days served, meaning that you get 3 days credit for every two days served. Get three years sentence, do two.
Do two years and it seems like three—so everything seems longer.
Considering 57 years is enough time to save about 10,574 hours of daylight savings time.
They say everything is relative—but we don’t know how fast our solar system is traveling so we don’t know how many light years old we are.
I stand on the street. I panhandle for a few minutes, asking passers by for spare change to cover up the fact that I am a rich successful dope dealer. I make about $10 panhandling. If I can’t make minimum wage it’s not worth begging for. Then I make a dope delivery for $250.
Obviously dope dealing pays better than panhandling.
Lisa will be pregnant 56 months in dog time. That’s a little over four years and two months.
Convert to the Drug Standard. The drug world moves on its own schedule independent of everything else. Predictably anywhere from 3 hours to 5 days late.
“Fruit Fly Years.”
But you can’t compare a fruit fly’s life span to a human being’s because people don’t go through a four stage metamorphosis, There’s no way to compare a pupa or a cocoon to a human teenager or infants to a larva.
Even though fruit flies go through their entire life cycle in less than 24 hours.
There is a pattern here. Not a seamless pattern. Not a faultless pattern. But a pattern. It’s obvious that if more people measured their lives in dog years they’d have a lot more time on their hands.
But that’s not entirely accurate, considering dogs turn a year older every 53 days. About a month and a half. So time is really zipping by for them while it’s passing at a not too leisurely pace for us.
I don’t know about parakeet years.
A lot of people figure years in “jail time” even though they haven’t been in jail the whole time. In jail time you get time off your sentence for “good time” and “work time”. Everybody gets one day off for every two days served, meaning that you get 3 days credit for every two days served. Get three years sentence, do two.
Do two years and it seems like three—so everything seems longer.
Considering 57 years is enough time to save about 10,574 hours of daylight savings time.
They say everything is relative—but we don’t know how fast our solar system is traveling so we don’t know how many light years old we are.
I stand on the street. I panhandle for a few minutes, asking passers by for spare change to cover up the fact that I am a rich successful dope dealer. I make about $10 panhandling. If I can’t make minimum wage it’s not worth begging for. Then I make a dope delivery for $250.
Obviously dope dealing pays better than panhandling.
Lisa will be pregnant 56 months in dog time. That’s a little over four years and two months.
Convert to the Drug Standard. The drug world moves on its own schedule independent of everything else. Predictably anywhere from 3 hours to 5 days late.
“Fruit Fly Years.”
But you can’t compare a fruit fly’s life span to a human being’s because people don’t go through a four stage metamorphosis, There’s no way to compare a pupa or a cocoon to a human teenager or infants to a larva.
Even though fruit flies go through their entire life cycle in less than 24 hours.
There is a pattern here. Not a seamless pattern. Not a faultless pattern. But a pattern. It’s obvious that if more people measured their lives in dog years they’d have a lot more time on their hands.
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